2log

There You Go Again

gerrit — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 08:34:33 CST

I decree that the following words or phrases should be considered derogatory, profane, or otherwise unfit for use in polite company by the year 2011.

Ausgezeichnet
Barrister
Barton Fink
Crankshaft
Dardanelles
Dyspeptic
Estes Kefauver
Hollandaise
Klickitat
Op/Ed
Petion
Ratatat
Segue
There
TürkoÄ�lu

Let's put our shaming fingers to work!

Nooze Roundout

Shay — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 06:17:54 CST

Today is the 20^th anniversary of Dr. Antonia Novello's swearing in as the first female Surgeon General of the United States, and as always, Google found a subtle way of working it into their logo:

The Dark Horse

gerrit — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 11:18:12 CST

We try to run a fair points competition here at 2log. And by fair, I mean grossly dishonest, corrupt, and prone to bribery.

But while conducting my routine audit of last week's points competition, I came across something weird. The winner of last week was one Ms. Florence the Diva Horse, a.k.a. Flo Sparkles Divine, a commenter who appeared once about a year ago and never commented since.

But you see, the particular algorithm that calculates the winner of the 2log points competition is something like the Goblet of Fire from Harry Potter. It seems to work by magic, and its word is gospel. In Harry Potter's fourth year, all of Hogwarts was atwitter when the goblet of fire chose Harry Potter as a fourth competitor for the Triwizard Tournament, in clear violation of the rules of the tournament guidelines. In his infinite wisdom, Dumbledore assumed the goblet knew best and allowed the contest to continue with all four, and was ultimately vindicated when the Triwizard Tournament ended with the death of the much-maligned Cedric Diggory (SPOILER ALERT).

Similarly, we may think it odd that the 2log has chosen "Flo Sparkles Divine" to win last week's competition, but we have to accept its wisdom. Thanks to all the 2loggers for your hard work writing entertaining articles for our readership, but roll out the red carpet for this week's reigning champion... that horse.

Nooze Roundup

Shay — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 07:27:25 CST

Some bits of recent news

Today is International Women's Day, and as always, Google found a subtle way of working it into their logo:

The Academy Awards were handed out yesterday, but one film was overlooked, though it dealt with the Iraq war, featured a well-known leading man testing his acting skills by playing a villain, and was only slightly less racist than Precious:

And finally, we have definitive proof that the internet will never replace the newspaper:

There's the Rub

Shay — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 11:48:52 CST

Obama puts on his best British accent and takes on the Bard:

(Last one, ~~I swear~~ I hope)

Come again...

Shay — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 09:29:40 CST

Another classic 2log post animated for your (dis)pleasure:

82nd Annual Oscar Cocktails

gerrit — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 09:17:15 CST

Expert mixologist Aaron returns with more Oscar-themed cocktails.

Movie	Drink	Ingredients	Comments
Inglorious Basterds	Ginglorious Basterds	Gin, Jager, Blood Orange	German and bloody.
Up in the Air	Up in the Flare	A shot of sambuca mini, lit on fire	Clooney's favorite drink meets his job activity.
The Blind Side	The Blind Cider	Blavod (black vodka), Martinelli's Apple Cider	The strong/sweet combo of the ingredients mirrors how Quinton Aaron and Sandra Bullock combine for 128 minutes of greatness.
District Nine	District Wine	South African Stellenbosch Wine, Watermelon, Shrimp (optional)	One of the top-rated South African wines, with a dash of racism. The optional shrimp reference the derogatory term "prawns" from the movie.
An Education	An Educa-sin	Pims, Gin, Blue Curacao	A beverage inspired by Mother Britain. The red, white, and blue ingredients form the colors of the Union Jack.
The Hurt Locker	The Hurt Liquor	24 oz. Tequila, filled with spiders and apathy	Not for the faint of heart.
Precious	Preshake	Milkshake made of bourbon, chocolate ice cream, and bacon	Bacon makes everything great
A Serious Man	A Serious Drink	A lukewarm glass of mineral water	Serve without garnish
Up	Heaven-Up	Aged Suntory whiskey and Seven-Up	The stiffness of age meets the sweet effervescence of youth. The bubbles lift away your earthly troubles.
Avatar	Guavatar	Guava Nectar, Blue Curacao, psilocybin	Mixed properly, should cause you to see extra dimensions for hours

RPN 14 -- Dsmvwld

gerrit — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 11:37:32 CST

Th gntlnt hs bn tssd nd Shy's chllng hs bn ccptd! Mrk nd hv fnshd cdng RPN 14, "Dsmvwld", whch tks ny wbpg nd rmvs th vwls. Fr nstnc, hr's scrnsht f Fnngn's wk wtht vwls. Mks vn ls sns:

Hwvr, th ffcl Sm Dngmn twttr cct mks mr sns:

njy, by vstng http://rpn.2log.biz//dsmvwld/

Dcs!

Awesome Interview With James Cameron

Sam — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 10:57:44 CST

Dudes--one of my dearest, oldest friends recently interviewed JAMES EFFING CAMERON at the offices of the Wall Street Journal, and in addition to that being just insanely cool, it's also a really insightful, smart interview. I think he does an amazing job of talking to James Cameron as an artist rather than a commodity, and you can hear the actual curiosity in his voice, which is something that I find lacking in most interiews. Check it out if you dig Avatar, James Cameron, or movie culture in general. Congrats, Mr. Crook!

The Road 2 Shambala: Exit 16-Stuck Between Studios

Sam — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 10:22:31 CST

In which the origin of the show is (mostly) explained in decidedly new-agey terms, our Panel of Distinguished Experts waxes nostalgic about their favorite all-time pairs of shoes, and Texas Cowboy Poetry Week is heartily celebrated.

The End of the Movie Industry

Shay — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 05:50:07 CST

Go to film school? Hire actors? Study animation? Get paid?

Why do all that when you could just go to Xtranormal and create fully animated movies like the standby 2log classic Chuck, Duck, or Marry starring Tom Stoppard and Maddona?

(note: the automated voice actors had some understandable difficulties with phrases like "deez nizutz in yo mutha trucking mizouf!", but I'm sure you all know the scene by heart anyway)

Enjoy:

Next...

Shay — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 10:53:16 CST

Everything you need to know about Chat Roulette:

By the way:

Percentage of perverts on Chat Roulette = 14%

Estimated rate of real unemployment = 14%

Makes you wonder...

NIXON'S BACK!

Shay — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 16:55:50 CST

"Computers may be twice as fast as they were in 1973, but your average voter is as drunk and stupid as ever. The only thing that's different is me; I've become bitter, and let's face it, crazy over the years. And once I'm swept into office, I'll sell our children's organs to zoos for meat, and I'll go into people's houses at night and wreck up the place. Muahahaha!"

Suits Me

gerrit — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 13:10:57 CST

Every man remembers his or her first suit.

I was in college, and needed to assemble a suit for an interview in NY.

The coat I stole from the drama department's poorly guarded costume room.

The shirt was a short sleeve collared shirt with the Pepsi logo proudly emblazoned over my left boob. During the interview, I couldn't move my left arm for fear of being exposed as a Pepsi sympathizer.

I recall the pants being sweat pants, or something like it.

I didn't get the job, but I'm still proud. If I could make that look so good, I can make anything look so good.

Clumsy

candice — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 13:04:34 CST

Yesterday, I posted a guessing game contest. No one guessed correctly, although the responses were fantastic.

Now, I will reveal the answer:

I spilled my breakfast, a lil cup of yogurt. Magically, it did not land on the floor, or onto my pants or shoes, but instead on the side of the computer tower. It was confusing and slightly gross. I also spilled blueberries on the floor, which rolled around the office in a very pretty way.

During lunch, I dropped my salad on the floor. I only got to eat half of it.

Two hours later, during an office birthday party, I dropped a cupcake on the floor.

I managed to make it through dinner without spilling anything, and I'm doing well so far today.

Thanks for reading this boring stuff about my clumsiness.

-C.